and I’m the dad.

May 15, 2013 | 2:14pm

If you have followed this blog for any period of time, you know my kids improvise songs quite regularly, especially when they are alone. Especially on the toilet. And especially quite loudly. I haven’t been writing down the lyrics as much as I’d like, but here is the latest set from Beth, age 4:

Rayco the pet acorn,
He’s my cute pet acorn,
He came down from the leaves
To be with me, me, meeeeee!
Every number has a name.
Every number has a dream.
If they don’t be careful,
They’re going to drown in the pool.
Sherpa wool, sherpa wool,
Is different from the snow.
Sherpa wool, sherpa wool,
Is the same color as the snow.
Sherpa wool, sherpa wool,
Is different from the snow.
Snow falls from the sky,
Sherpa wool doesn’t.
Sherpa wool, sherpa wool, SHERPA WOOOOOOL!
Bird beaks go to meat meat,
And then they toot toot toot.
I just came up to get a brush,
And nosy where to there?
I just came up to get a brush,
And nosy where to there!
(repeat 50x)
Sun strings, sun strings,
Shine through everythings,
It’s really weird that the sun is hot
And I don’t understand it but
The sun is as bright as me!

Various past lyrics:

From Beth: 1, 2, and this Thanksgiving thing.
From Luke: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9.
Also this.

I should probably compile all these into one page, eh?

URL: http://tmblr.co/ZJZiexl2Y4iB | SHARE:

February 17, 2013 | 8:30am

Songs of the Boy, Part 9

It’s been awhile, but here are some more lines from Luke’s improvised singing:

If you hit my anger button / You’re gonna be sorry sorry SORRY!
There are butts in the air / There are butts on the ground / There are butts in the ocean / There are butts all around / There are butts butts butts butts BUUUUUUUUUTTS!
You got more rocks in your head / Than I have in my rock collection / And I think you’re stuck.
Don’t flush the chicken down the toilet / Unless Dad has the plunger ready.

Various past lyrics:

From Luke: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8.
From Beth, see 1, 2, and this Thanksgiving thing.
Also this.

URL: http://tmblr.co/ZJZiexeLMyXD | SHARE:

December 13, 2012 | 8:30am

Songs of the Boy, Part 8

More lines from Luke’s improvised singing:

Welcome to the Buttcheek Rodeo / Hang on and watch out!
Polly ain’t getting a waffle from Daddy today!
A billion barnacle buckteeth can’t be wrong.
Once when I was a child / There was poop on the ceiling.

Past lyrics from Luke: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7.

For songs from Beth, see 1, 2, and this Thanksgiving thing.

Also, inexplicably, this.

URL: http://tmblr.co/ZJZiexZEsLkH | SHARE:

November 25, 2012 | 9:00am

It's a Small World After All

[Scene:	Luke, age 8, is sitting on the toilet singing "It's a Small World After All" at the top of his lungs]
Me:	[knocking on bathroom door] "Could you quiet down a little?"
Luke:	"But I'm singing!"
Me:	"Yeah, everyone can hear you, even upstairs."
Luke:	"No, I'm singing about my poop! I'm constipated and it's all coming out small!" [launches into a new round of the song]
Me:	"Um. Could you just sing a little more quietly, please."
Luke:	"But it helps me go! Come on, sing with me!"

URL: http://tmblr.co/ZJZiexY03q6g | SHARE:

Filed under: song singing bathroom small world disney poop toilet kids boys child children childhood parents parenting parenthood dads fathers fathering fatherhood quiet loud volume

October 22, 2012 | 8:15am

"I’m a little teapot,
short and stout.
If I were a robot,
you’d be dead."

— Beth, age 4

URL: http://tmblr.co/ZJZiexVmHPua | SHARE:

Filed under: poetry song teapot kids children singing quote oneliner child dads poem sing fathers parents

September 2, 2012 | 7:33am

CHEESEHEAD!

Somehow, the song of the week for both kids is this:

“I love myself, I love myself, I love myself, CHEESEHEAD!”

Typically they sing it as a duet. Loudly. Over and over, with much hysterics and giggling. Occasionally Beth adds at the end, “ahhh baby bottle.”