November 5, 2012  |  9:33am
United Supernova!
Me: "What are you doing?"
Luke: [age 8] "I'm giving Beth pushes on the swing and telling her all the different levels of swinging."
Me: "Different levels of swinging?"
Luke: "Yeah, you know, names for how high you are swinging. Like different levels."
Me: "I didn't know there were levels. What are they?"
Luke: "The first one is Knight. Then there's Baron. Then there's Princess. Then Princess Supernova, Queen, Queen Supernova, King, King Supernova, and finally United and United Supernova."
Me: "United Supernova?"
Luke: "Yeah, United is all the others combined together -- that's the highest level of all, except Supernova makes it even higher. United Supernova!"
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Filed under: swing levels baron knight princess king queen united supernova swinging play siblings boys child children childhood playground dads fathers fathering fatherhood parents parenting parenthood together combine
November 2, 2012  |  9:00am
We only buy royal tape
Beth: [age 4] "Stand next to me. Now, spin around in a circle." [we spin around together] "Now, do you see the light?"
Me: "What light?"
Beth: "The magic light! Look up!"
Me: "Ohhh. Yes, of course, I see the light."
Beth: "Good. Now wait for the magic carpets. Just wait... Hold on... Okay! They are here! Hold my hand and jump on with me!"
Me: [holds her hand and jumps in place] "Okay! We're on the magic carpet! Where are we going?"
Beth: "Up to the light! Hold on." [makes swooshing noises]
Me: "We're moving really fast. I'm going to close my eyes until we get there."
Beth: "We're there! Open your eyes."
Me: "Okay, great." [we jump in place again] "Now what?"
Beth: "Just a minute." [twirls around twice, then taps me on the chest with her magic wand]
Me: "What are you doing?"
Beth: "I'm putting magic in your heart! But now you have to fix my wand."
Me: [examines wand] "Hmm. I think it needs tape on that part."
Beth: "Well, I'm a princess and you're a king, so it needs /royal/ tape."
Me: [gets out tape and repairs wand] "Here you go."
Beth: "Are you sure it was /royal/ tape?"
Me: [examines Scotch tape package again] "Absolutely. In this house, we only buy royal tape."
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Filed under: tape wand toys kids girls magic fairies fairy princess child children childhood parents parenting parenthood dads fathers fathering fatherhood
October 4, 2012  |  9:07am
Most fabulous
Beth: [age 4] "I am the princess. I am the most fabulous one in the castle."
Me: "But I'm the king, right? So can I be the second most fabulous?"
Beth: "No."
Me: "Why not?"
Beth: "Oh, Daddy. Even though you are the king, you are still a boy. And boys can't be fabulous. Only girls are princesses, and only girls are fabulous."
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Filed under: fabulous royalty king princess castle girls boys gender child children childhood parents parenting parenthood dads fathers fathering fatherhood
September 27, 2012  |  9:22am
Pick up your Linny Tinny
Beth: [age 4] "Okay. Now pick up your Linny Tinny."
Me: "My what?"
Beth: "Your Linny Tinny!"
Me: "I have a Linny Tinny?"
Beth: "Yes! It's your leg." [motions to my right leg]
Me: "Oh. I didn't know my right leg had a name. Does my left leg have a name?"
Beth: "That one is called Lefty."
Me: "Do my arms have names?"
Beth: "Yes. That one is Willy, and the other one is Junie. You have a boy arm and a girl arm."
Me: "Hmm. Do /your/ arms and legs have names?"
Beth: "Of course not! I'm a princess. I give other people names. I don't keep them for myself!"
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Filed under: legs arms limbs names naming princess body body parts girls dads fathers fathering fatherhood child children childhood parents parenting parenthood play playing kids bodies
August 5, 2012  |  8:39am
"Somebody’s gotta be the princess, and it might as well be me!"

— Beth, age 4

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Filed under: princess oneliner girls kids child children childhood play dads fathers fathering fatherhood parents parenting parenthood
May 22, 2012  |  8:53am
Princess Feeds the World
Beth: [age 3] "Let's play 'Princess Feeds the World'."
Me: "Hmm. I've never played that before. You'll have to tell me what to do."
Beth: "It's easy! You sit down in that chair and I'll stand over here. This --" [gestures to middle of the room] "-- is the world."
Me: [sits] "Okay. Now what do I do?"
Beth: "You are the Sunshine King. I am the Water Princess. So first we have fly around the world and throw seeds over the ground, like this." [tiptoes gracefully around the room, scattering imaginary seeds onto the floor]
Me: "Can I do that?"
Beth: "Open your hand. ... Here are some seeds." [drops imaginary seeds into my hand] "Now, plant them!"
Me: [attempts to imitate graceful movements around the room]
Beth: "Oh Daddy. Really. No. Not like that at all. Like THIS." [repeats what she did earlier]
Me: "I thought that's what I was doing."
Beth: "You were doing it wrong. Just sit down and let me do it."
[she continues hovering around the room, scattering seed, for a minute or two]
Beth: "Okay. Now we need to water the seeds."
Me: "Can I do that?"
Beth: "No, you are the Sunshine King. A Sunshine King cannot make rain. Only a Water Princess can make rain. Like this." [puts hands behind her back and flutters around the room, passing over the scattered imaginary seeds] "There. I watered the plants with rain."
Me: "Now what?"
Beth: "Now you shine on them."
Me: "How do I do that?"
Beth: "You're a Sunshine King! All Sunshine Kings know how to shine. Just do it!"
Me: "Okay, okay. I'll try." [I get up, put my hands out, and move around the room trying to look like I'm beaming sunrays toward the imaginary seeds]
Me: "How's that?"
Beth: "It's not bad. Do it again. They need more."
Me: [repeats]
Beth: "Stop. That's enough. Now sit down and wait with me."
Me: [sits] "How long do we have to wait?"
Beth: "Until the plants grow."
Me: "Okay. I'm going to talk a sunshine nap. You let me know when they're done." [leans back, closes eyes]
Beth: [waits a minute, then grabs my arm] "Look! They're ready!"
Me: [opens eyes] "Great! So what did we plant?"
Beth: "We have corn and tomatoes and lettuce and carrots. Now we just have to pick everything and give it to the world to eat!"
Me: "Is this enough for the whole world?"
Beth: "Of course it is! As long as you don't eat too much. Now help me pick it or you don't get any."
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Filed under: princess imagination imaginary game seed seeds plant planting harvest food world eat sunshine water rain royalty kids girls dads fathers fatherhood fathering parents parenting parenthood child children childhood